+At little while later, in Luxembourg+

(Gustav is sitting, enjoying a newspaper after a long day of
vamp-vanquishing. Max is excitedly regaling the story of how, that day, he
and his uncle had staked three -count 'em! - three vampires! Chris and
Sophie are watching tennis, not even trying to pretend to be interested.
This is the fourth time Max has told them it in as many hours. Suddenly
there is a knock at the door, and Max jumps up to get it. He peers through
the peephole, and doesn't recognize the spiky-haired guy on the stoop,
waiting -if a bit impatiently- for the door to open. Max turns the handle
and before he can even say 'hello', the man barges right through and into
the living room)

VEGETA
Are you Gustav Helsing?

GUSTAV
(Standing cautiously as Chris and Sophie jump up too. Vegeta's not a vamp
because he wasn't invited and he came in anyway, but that doesn't mean he
isn't dangerous)
Yes... I am. What can I do for you, Mr...?

VEGETA
Prince Vegeta of the Saiya-jin. But that's not important. I want to kill
Dracula, but I need you to tell me all about him first. Secondly, I want
any weapons you have that will aid in my destruction of him. I am powerful,
and stronger than he, but he is immortal, and I cannot compete with
that.... (smiles smugly) yet.

(Chris, Sophie, and Max all gawk like idiots)

VEGETA
By Dende! Is every one on Chikyuu a moron? BAKAS! Must I repeat myself!!

CHRIS
I don't know what a Baka is, but I think I resent being called it.

VEGETA
No one asked you, whelp. (Glares pointedly at Chris, then turns back to
Gustav with fire in his Saiyan-black eyes) Now, will you help me willingly,
old man, or must I blow you into another dimension?

+Kami's Look Out, later that evening+

(Vegeta lands in the courtyard, and glares around. He then motions to the
edge, and an air car shakily clears it and land with a *thunk*. The Helsing
crew comes wobbling out, Chris obviously sick to his stomach. He leans
over the edge and retches, then yips when he opens his eyes and sees how
high up he is. Sophie barely saves him from going right over. Gustav
studies the car with fascination, and, exasperated, Vegeta snaps it back into
its capsule right under his nose. Vegeta shoves it into his boot and
stalks across the courtyard. Mr. Popo comes waddling out of a room, and
Veggie swats him aside. Dende then appears, hovering above Vegeta's head, a
furious expression written all over his little green face. Vegeta glares
back with haughty determination, and refuses to crane his neck to look the
small Namek in the eye)

DENDE
Vegeta! What are they doing here?! You know I can't allow this! It's
completely against the rules!

VEGETA
I can do what pleases me, Namek! And it pleases me to destroy Dracula. And
if I must break the rules of Chikyuu's deities to do so, so will it be!

DENDE
You cannot...!

VEGETA
I am the Prince of the Saiya-jin, and I can!

DENDE
(antennae sticking straight up, eyes glowing with inner fire)
AND I AM GOD!

VEGETA
(Glares hatefully, then shrugs, smirks, and walks off in the direction of
Bulma's ki)

DENDE
(lowers back to the tiles as his temper cools and he regains his composure.
He turns to the Helsings, who are awestruck)
I am really very sorry that you witnessed that.
(sends a look in the direction the Prince went) He really is the most
infuriating creature...

GUSTAV
We're sorry for intruding, sir... If you'd like us to go--

DENDE
No, please, don't feel unwanted. You are welcome here. (smiles) The rules are broken now, so why bother trying to fix them
until this whole mess is sorted out? Please, come with me. (turns and
gestures. Mr. Popo, who has regained his feet, shows them into a Japanese
style sitting room, and the all get comfortable. Max punches his pillow a
few times to get it the right shape and Gustav glares at him)

My name is Dende, and this is Mr. Popo. Welcome to Kami's Lookout.

MAX
Where...?

DENDE
Yes. (laughs) I've forgotten how you earthlings mostly don't know about this place. It's where I - well, watch.

GUSTAV
Please, excuse my forwardness, but did you call yourself a 'god'?

DENDE
(exchanges a look with Popo, who nods)
Yes, I did. And, yes, I am - of a sort. But you should know that I'm relatively new to this. I've only been Earth's guardian for a few weeks.

CHRIS
A few weeks?!

POPO
(With sorrowful admiration in his voice)
Before Dende came to earth, Kami was the Guardian. He looked over Earth
for centuries. When Piccolo died... Kami did too, and we needed to find a
new guardian. Dende was chosen.

(There is a moment of silence as everyone takes it in.)

SOPHIE
If... if you're a god... then why can't you just kill Dracula yourself?

DENDE
I'm not allowed to interfere.

MAX
Says who?

DENDE
(shrugs noncommittally)

GUSTAV
Max!

MAX
What?!

DENDE
(laughs) Really.... I don't know! Those are just the rules!
Seriously, though. Vegeta needs your help because you have knowledge of the
Strag--(the Helsings look at him blankly) -- ah, that is Vampires -- that I just haven't acquired yet. Also, you have weapons that Vegeta is unfamiliar with, and the knowledge of how to use them. Vegeta is the Prince of
the Saiya-jin, but I don't think he's ever used a crossbow. Lastly, you have the only existing
copy of a remedy for vampirism. It will be... useful in the future.
Gohan will--
(Popo elbows him and Dende shuts up, suddenly remembering that he's not allowed to tell. He smiles sheepishly.)
I think perhaps it will be needed later.

GUSTAV
Sir... we're...we're missing a key ingredient...

DENDE
(Holding up a leafy twig)
You mean this...?

GUSTAV, MAX, SOPH, CHRIS
......

VEGETA
(Puts a fist, then his head through the paper wall)
Are you bakas going to stare at trees all day, or will you help my woman?!

(The Helsings exchange a glance and snatch up their bags and follow the
Prince into Bulma's room, where she's in a fevered cold sweat, and
convulsing uncontrollably. The whites of her eyes dart back and forth and
she is mumbling. Gustav's heart breaks seeing her like this, and Sophie
hides her head in Chris' shoulder. Max approaches slowly and touches her
forehead. Vegeta glares at him from his perch on the edge of the pallet,
and rubs her clenched hands tenderly.)

MAX
(Horrified by the cruelness of this)
Is... is Lucard doing this...?

GUSTAV
Yes...
(Pulls some holy objects out of his bag and sets to work.)

+Elsewhere at the same time+

LUCARD
(Flinches as he feels the holy objects work on Bulma, and concentrates harder as the blood sweat trickles down his face. He grabs the
edge of his armchair and breaks the arms right off as growls.)
This victory will be mine, Saiyan. And it will be sweet!

+Back at the Look Out+

(Max is seated outside reading up on Vampirism. He hears footsteps pad up
and a shaggy head peeks over his shoulder.)

GOHAN
Is that a book about Strag?

MAX
Strag...? Oh, that's what Dende called a vampire, isn't it?

GOHAN
(sitting on the steps beside Max)
Yeah. You know... I've never seen Dende so mad before... He looked like my
Mom.

GOKOU
(walking up)
Son Gohan! Don't talk about your mother that way.

GOHAN
Sorry, Daddy. Daddy, this is... uh..

MAX
Max

GOHAN
Max. He's here to help Vegeta, too.

MAX
Too..? You're helping?

GOKOU
Bulma's an old friend. We'd do anything for her.

MAX
Even fight Dracula?

GOKOU
(shrugs)
We've fought -and beaten- worse.

MAX
So why do you need us?

GOKOU
I don't know. Dende just said we would. (looks with sad affection at
Gohan, who is wrapped up in Max's book. Max catches this look, and
remembers that Dende had hinted that something might happen to Gohan.)

MAX
(Under his breath and with as much positiveness as he can)
I won't let anything happen to your son.

GOKOU
(Nods slowly, once.)

****

(Gustav stands in Dende's kitchen,
trying without much success to work the blender. Gohan, curious to see what he's
doing, comes in and is hovering over his shoulder, making it hard to concentrate. .)

GOHAN
What's that?

GUSTAV
A leaf from an old, old tree.

GOHAN
What are you doing?

GUSTAV
(chuckles - cute kid, he thinks) Well, little fellow, I'm making a special medicine so Bulma can get better.
(pours in wolf's blood)
Now, if only I could figure out how to turn this thing on…

GOHAN
How does it work?

GUSTAV
(sighs deeply) Well, she has to drink it. And then it … well, you wouldn't understand.

GOHAN:
Oh, I see. The parasitic quality of the antigen works primarily against the assimilatory nature of the vampiric microbes by invading those protozoa already infected and using its reproductive nature to spread the restorative.

GUSTAV
(stares)

GOHAN
(smiles)
Bye!
(flies away)

Gustav stares after him for a moment, then gets back to trying to work the blender.

+On Earth, back in Luxembourg+

(Lucard is trying to deal with all his appointments for the day and hang on to Bulma's subconscious at the same time. He's finding it's not that easy to do.)

ANNOYING NAMELESS BUSINESS-TYPE PERSON:
... And so you see, M. Lucard, that in order for your business to even begin to flourish in those coastal waters, you will need to completely revamp blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah...

LUCARD
(stares into space directly to the left of Annoying Nameless Business-Type Person)

ANNOYING NAMELESS BUSINESS-TYPE PERSON:
...Uh... M. Lucard? Are you listening to me?

LUCARD
Um.

ANNOYING NAMELESS BUSINESS-TYPE PERSON:
Well, as I was saying, the...

(Lucard suddenly gasps as if in pain and grasps his both sides of his head.)

ANNOYING NAMELESS BUSINESS-TYPE PERSON:
... M. Lucard? Are you all right?

LUCARD
(trying to hand on to dignity for a few more moments while liquid fire is pouring through his veins)
.... Please, Mr. Kowasaka... if you could... make another appointment with my secretary, Miss Greyes... Coming on me now is a migraine headache, and I will therefore be unable this business day to complete...

ANNOYING NAMELESS BUSINESS-TYPE PERSON WHO IS NOW KNOWN AS MR. KOWASAKA:
(blinks at Lucard's unconscious reversion to Wallachian grammar, but doesn't comment.)
Certainly, M. Lucard. You know, they say if you eat six raw almonds it can...
(sees Lucard wince and takes the hint) Uh, right. I hope your day improves.

LUCARD
(muttered, as Annoy... you get the idea... leaves:)
Not very damned likely....

(presses button)
Miss Greyes, would you please postpone any remaining appointments I have today? I am not feeling well, and am going home.

(and with monumentally bad timing, Klaus hops into the room)

KLAUS
(considerably louder than he should)
Hello, Lucard-san! Did your meeting with the inauspicious Japanese fellow go all....

LUCARD
...shut up...
(rises to leave)

KLAUS
(like a happy puppy; hasn't gone bitter and weird yet) Can we go out tonight? Huh? Can we? Huh?

LUCARD
(sighs) Perhaps. But first I need to take care of something.
(stand up straight and closes his eyes; concentrates, meditating on Bulma's mind alone. Even Klaus, for just a moment, notices how beautiful Lucard is when he's like this. Stab of jealousy; not a good thing.)

LUCARD
(knits eyebrows for just a moment. Exhales, looking infinitely relieved)
There. That should help to take care of things for a little while. I have to tell you, Klaus, that I am in the middle of a most interesting business proposition. I stand to get a beautiful woman and an invincible slave out of it. I'll tell you all about it over dinner....

Part Three (that's right - we wrote more of it)
Get me the HFIL out of here!!